Understanding
Personality Disorders
Personality disorders involve enduring patterns of thinking, feeling, and behaving that significantly impact relationships, work, and daily functioning, often beginning in early adulthood.
Understanding
Personality Disorders
Personality disorders involve enduring patterns of thinking, feeling, and behaving that significantly impact relationships, work, and daily functioning, often beginning in early adulthood.
Understanding
Personality Disorders
Personality disorders involve enduring patterns of thinking, feeling, and behaving that significantly impact relationships, work, and daily functioning, often beginning in early adulthood.
What do personality disorders feel like?
Living with a personality disorder can feel like being trapped in patterns of thinking and behaving that seem impossible to change, despite causing significant distress and relationship difficulties. Individuals often experience intense emotions, unstable self-image, and challenges in maintaining consistent relationships, whilst struggling with a deep sense that something is fundamentally different about how they experience the world. The internal experience may involve chronic feelings of emptiness, fear of abandonment, or difficulty trusting others, creating a cycle where attempts to connect with people often result in conflict or rejection.
The condition extends beyond temporary difficulties into persistent patterns that feel deeply ingrained and automatic, making it challenging to respond to situations in ways that feel authentic yet appropriate. Many people describe feeling like they're wearing a mask or constantly trying to figure out the "right" way to be, leading to exhaustion and identity confusion. The emotional intensity can be overwhelming, with small events triggering disproportionate responses that seem confusing to both the individual and those around them. This often results in a sense of isolation and shame, particularly when others struggle to understand why seemingly simple social interactions feel so challenging and emotionally charged.
Common Symptoms
Unstable relationships with patterns of idealization and devaluation
Chronic feelings of emptiness or identity confusion
Intense fear of abandonment or rejection
Difficulty regulating emotions and impulsive behaviours
Black-and-white thinking patterns about self and others
Problems with self-image and sense of personal identity
Challenges with empathy and understanding others' perspectives
Persistent feelings of being misunderstood or different from others
What do personality disorders feel like?
Living with a personality disorder can feel like being trapped in patterns of thinking and behaving that seem impossible to change, despite causing significant distress and relationship difficulties. Individuals often experience intense emotions, unstable self-image, and challenges in maintaining consistent relationships, whilst struggling with a deep sense that something is fundamentally different about how they experience the world. The internal experience may involve chronic feelings of emptiness, fear of abandonment, or difficulty trusting others, creating a cycle where attempts to connect with people often result in conflict or rejection.
The condition extends beyond temporary difficulties into persistent patterns that feel deeply ingrained and automatic, making it challenging to respond to situations in ways that feel authentic yet appropriate. Many people describe feeling like they're wearing a mask or constantly trying to figure out the "right" way to be, leading to exhaustion and identity confusion. The emotional intensity can be overwhelming, with small events triggering disproportionate responses that seem confusing to both the individual and those around them. This often results in a sense of isolation and shame, particularly when others struggle to understand why seemingly simple social interactions feel so challenging and emotionally charged.
Common Symptoms
Unstable relationships with patterns of idealization and devaluation
Chronic feelings of emptiness or identity confusion
Intense fear of abandonment or rejection
Difficulty regulating emotions and impulsive behaviours
Black-and-white thinking patterns about self and others
Problems with self-image and sense of personal identity
Challenges with empathy and understanding others' perspectives
Persistent feelings of being misunderstood or different from others
What do personality disorders feel like?
Living with a personality disorder can feel like being trapped in patterns of thinking and behaving that seem impossible to change, despite causing significant distress and relationship difficulties. Individuals often experience intense emotions, unstable self-image, and challenges in maintaining consistent relationships, whilst struggling with a deep sense that something is fundamentally different about how they experience the world. The internal experience may involve chronic feelings of emptiness, fear of abandonment, or difficulty trusting others, creating a cycle where attempts to connect with people often result in conflict or rejection.
The condition extends beyond temporary difficulties into persistent patterns that feel deeply ingrained and automatic, making it challenging to respond to situations in ways that feel authentic yet appropriate. Many people describe feeling like they're wearing a mask or constantly trying to figure out the "right" way to be, leading to exhaustion and identity confusion. The emotional intensity can be overwhelming, with small events triggering disproportionate responses that seem confusing to both the individual and those around them. This often results in a sense of isolation and shame, particularly when others struggle to understand why seemingly simple social interactions feel so challenging and emotionally charged.
Common Symptoms
Unstable relationships with patterns of idealization and devaluation
Chronic feelings of emptiness or identity confusion
Intense fear of abandonment or rejection
Difficulty regulating emotions and impulsive behaviours
Black-and-white thinking patterns about self and others
Problems with self-image and sense of personal identity
Challenges with empathy and understanding others' perspectives
Persistent feelings of being misunderstood or different from others
History of Personality Disorders
From moral insanity to modern dimensional understanding of personality functioning
1835
British psychiatrist James Cowles Prichard introduced the concept of "moral insanity," describing individuals with disturbed behaviour but intact intellectual function, laying groundwork for personality disorder concepts.
1952
The first edition of the DSM included "personality pattern disturbance" categories, marking the formal recognition of personality disorders as distinct mental health conditions requiring professional treatment and support.
1980
DSM-III established specific personality disorder criteria on a separate axis, revolutionising diagnosis and treatment approaches whilst reducing stigma through clearer clinical definitions and evidence-based frameworks.
Present
Modern approaches emphasise dimensional models of personality functioning, with effective treatments like DBT and schema therapy offering hope and significant improvement for millions of people worldwide.
History of Personality Disorders
From moral insanity to modern dimensional understanding of personality functioning
1835
British psychiatrist James Cowles Prichard introduced the concept of "moral insanity," describing individuals with disturbed behaviour but intact intellectual function, laying groundwork for personality disorder concepts.
1952
The first edition of the DSM included "personality pattern disturbance" categories, marking the formal recognition of personality disorders as distinct mental health conditions requiring professional treatment and support.
1980
DSM-III established specific personality disorder criteria on a separate axis, revolutionising diagnosis and treatment approaches whilst reducing stigma through clearer clinical definitions and evidence-based frameworks.
Present
Modern approaches emphasise dimensional models of personality functioning, with effective treatments like DBT and schema therapy offering hope and significant improvement for millions of people worldwide.
History of Personality Disorders
From moral insanity to modern dimensional understanding of personality functioning
1835
British psychiatrist James Cowles Prichard introduced the concept of "moral insanity," describing individuals with disturbed behaviour but intact intellectual function, laying groundwork for personality disorder concepts.
1952
The first edition of the DSM included "personality pattern disturbance" categories, marking the formal recognition of personality disorders as distinct mental health conditions requiring professional treatment and support.
1980
DSM-III established specific personality disorder criteria on a separate axis, revolutionising diagnosis and treatment approaches whilst reducing stigma through clearer clinical definitions and evidence-based frameworks.
Present
Modern approaches emphasise dimensional models of personality functioning, with effective treatments like DBT and schema therapy offering hope and significant improvement for millions of people worldwide.
Take our free self-test
Take our free self-test
Take a short self-test to see if counselling might make a difference.
Take a short self-test to see if counselling might make a difference.
Instructions
Answer the questions based on the last few weeks. Choose the option that fits best. You’ll see your results at the end.
This short self-test explores whether therapy could be helpful for you right now. It isn’t a diagnosis, but it can help you decide next steps.
Instructions
Answer the questions based on the last few weeks. Choose the option that fits best. You’ll see your results at the end.
This short self-test explores whether therapy could be helpful for you right now. It isn’t a diagnosis, but it can help you decide next steps.
Instructions
Answer the questions based on the last few weeks. Choose the option that fits best. You’ll see your results at the end.
This short self-test explores whether therapy could be helpful for you right now. It isn’t a diagnosis, but it can help you decide next steps.
How therapy can help
Therapy for personality disorders focuses on developing emotional regulation skills, improving interpersonal relationships, and building a more stable sense of self through evidence-based approaches like Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT), Schema Therapy, and Mentalization-Based Treatment (MBT). These specialised therapies help individuals understand their emotional patterns, develop healthier coping mechanisms, and learn to navigate relationships more effectively. Therapists work collaboratively to identify triggers, challenge unhelpful thinking patterns, and gradually build the skills needed for more stable and fulfilling relationships.
Long-term therapeutic relationships provide a safe space to practice new ways of relating and responding to challenges, with therapists offering consistent support whilst helping clients develop their own internal resources. Group therapy components are often particularly valuable, allowing individuals to practice interpersonal skills in a supportive environment and learn from others with similar experiences. The therapeutic process recognises that change takes time and patience, focusing on gradual progress rather than expecting immediate transformation. Many people find that therapy not only helps manage symptoms but also leads to profound personal growth and a much deeper understanding of themselves and their relationships.
Benefits of Therapy
Improved emotional regulation and distress tolerance skills
More stable and satisfying interpersonal relationships
Increased self-awareness and understanding of personal patterns
Reduced impulsive behaviours and self-destructive tendencies
Better sense of identity and personal values
Enhanced ability to maintain employment and social functioning
Decreased symptoms of depression, anxiety, and other co-occurring conditions
Greater overall life satisfaction and sense of personal agency
Frequently Asked Questions
Addressing common misconceptions and concerns about personality disorders and treatment
Are personality disorders just character flaws or bad behaviour?
No, personality disorders are legitimate mental health conditions involving differences in brain structure and function, often developing from complex interactions between genetics, early experiences, and environmental factors. They're not moral failings or choices, but rather patterns that developed as survival mechanisms. With proper support and treatment, people with personality disorders can learn new skills and experience significant improvement in their relationships and quality of life.
Can personality disorders be treated or are they permanent?
Personality disorders are highly treatable with appropriate therapy and support. While they represent enduring patterns, research consistently shows that people can experience substantial improvement with evidence-based treatments like DBT, Schema Therapy, and MBT. Many individuals develop stable relationships, successful careers, and fulfilling lives. Recovery is often a gradual process that requires patience and commitment, but positive change is absolutely possible.
Will having a personality disorder diagnosis affect my relationships and career?
A diagnosis can actually be helpful for understanding yourself better and accessing appropriate treatment. You're not required to disclose your diagnosis to employers or friends, and many successful people manage personality disorders effectively. The key is working with qualified professionals to develop coping strategies and relationship skills. With proper support, most people maintain meaningful relationships and successful careers.
How long does treatment typically take to see improvements?
Many people begin noticing some improvements within the first few months of consistent therapy, particularly in areas like emotional regulation and crisis management skills. More significant changes in relationship patterns and self-image typically develop over 1-2 years of committed treatment. However, the timeline varies greatly between individuals, and some benefits of therapy continue developing for years. The important thing is finding the right therapeutic approach and maintaining consistent engagement with treatment.
How therapy can help
Therapy for personality disorders focuses on developing emotional regulation skills, improving interpersonal relationships, and building a more stable sense of self through evidence-based approaches like Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT), Schema Therapy, and Mentalization-Based Treatment (MBT). These specialised therapies help individuals understand their emotional patterns, develop healthier coping mechanisms, and learn to navigate relationships more effectively. Therapists work collaboratively to identify triggers, challenge unhelpful thinking patterns, and gradually build the skills needed for more stable and fulfilling relationships.
Long-term therapeutic relationships provide a safe space to practice new ways of relating and responding to challenges, with therapists offering consistent support whilst helping clients develop their own internal resources. Group therapy components are often particularly valuable, allowing individuals to practice interpersonal skills in a supportive environment and learn from others with similar experiences. The therapeutic process recognises that change takes time and patience, focusing on gradual progress rather than expecting immediate transformation. Many people find that therapy not only helps manage symptoms but also leads to profound personal growth and a much deeper understanding of themselves and their relationships.
Benefits of Therapy
Improved emotional regulation and distress tolerance skills
More stable and satisfying interpersonal relationships
Increased self-awareness and understanding of personal patterns
Reduced impulsive behaviours and self-destructive tendencies
Better sense of identity and personal values
Enhanced ability to maintain employment and social functioning
Decreased symptoms of depression, anxiety, and other co-occurring conditions
Greater overall life satisfaction and sense of personal agency
Frequently Asked Questions
Addressing common misconceptions and concerns about personality disorders and treatment
Are personality disorders just character flaws or bad behaviour?
No, personality disorders are legitimate mental health conditions involving differences in brain structure and function, often developing from complex interactions between genetics, early experiences, and environmental factors. They're not moral failings or choices, but rather patterns that developed as survival mechanisms. With proper support and treatment, people with personality disorders can learn new skills and experience significant improvement in their relationships and quality of life.
Can personality disorders be treated or are they permanent?
Personality disorders are highly treatable with appropriate therapy and support. While they represent enduring patterns, research consistently shows that people can experience substantial improvement with evidence-based treatments like DBT, Schema Therapy, and MBT. Many individuals develop stable relationships, successful careers, and fulfilling lives. Recovery is often a gradual process that requires patience and commitment, but positive change is absolutely possible.
Will having a personality disorder diagnosis affect my relationships and career?
A diagnosis can actually be helpful for understanding yourself better and accessing appropriate treatment. You're not required to disclose your diagnosis to employers or friends, and many successful people manage personality disorders effectively. The key is working with qualified professionals to develop coping strategies and relationship skills. With proper support, most people maintain meaningful relationships and successful careers.
How long does treatment typically take to see improvements?
Many people begin noticing some improvements within the first few months of consistent therapy, particularly in areas like emotional regulation and crisis management skills. More significant changes in relationship patterns and self-image typically develop over 1-2 years of committed treatment. However, the timeline varies greatly between individuals, and some benefits of therapy continue developing for years. The important thing is finding the right therapeutic approach and maintaining consistent engagement with treatment.
How therapy can help
Therapy for personality disorders focuses on developing emotional regulation skills, improving interpersonal relationships, and building a more stable sense of self through evidence-based approaches like Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT), Schema Therapy, and Mentalization-Based Treatment (MBT). These specialised therapies help individuals understand their emotional patterns, develop healthier coping mechanisms, and learn to navigate relationships more effectively. Therapists work collaboratively to identify triggers, challenge unhelpful thinking patterns, and gradually build the skills needed for more stable and fulfilling relationships.
Long-term therapeutic relationships provide a safe space to practice new ways of relating and responding to challenges, with therapists offering consistent support whilst helping clients develop their own internal resources. Group therapy components are often particularly valuable, allowing individuals to practice interpersonal skills in a supportive environment and learn from others with similar experiences. The therapeutic process recognises that change takes time and patience, focusing on gradual progress rather than expecting immediate transformation. Many people find that therapy not only helps manage symptoms but also leads to profound personal growth and a much deeper understanding of themselves and their relationships.
Benefits of Therapy
Improved emotional regulation and distress tolerance skills
More stable and satisfying interpersonal relationships
Increased self-awareness and understanding of personal patterns
Reduced impulsive behaviours and self-destructive tendencies
Better sense of identity and personal values
Enhanced ability to maintain employment and social functioning
Decreased symptoms of depression, anxiety, and other co-occurring conditions
Greater overall life satisfaction and sense of personal agency
Frequently Asked Questions
Addressing common misconceptions and concerns about personality disorders and treatment
Are personality disorders just character flaws or bad behaviour?
No, personality disorders are legitimate mental health conditions involving differences in brain structure and function, often developing from complex interactions between genetics, early experiences, and environmental factors. They're not moral failings or choices, but rather patterns that developed as survival mechanisms. With proper support and treatment, people with personality disorders can learn new skills and experience significant improvement in their relationships and quality of life.
Can personality disorders be treated or are they permanent?
Personality disorders are highly treatable with appropriate therapy and support. While they represent enduring patterns, research consistently shows that people can experience substantial improvement with evidence-based treatments like DBT, Schema Therapy, and MBT. Many individuals develop stable relationships, successful careers, and fulfilling lives. Recovery is often a gradual process that requires patience and commitment, but positive change is absolutely possible.
Will having a personality disorder diagnosis affect my relationships and career?
A diagnosis can actually be helpful for understanding yourself better and accessing appropriate treatment. You're not required to disclose your diagnosis to employers or friends, and many successful people manage personality disorders effectively. The key is working with qualified professionals to develop coping strategies and relationship skills. With proper support, most people maintain meaningful relationships and successful careers.
How long does treatment typically take to see improvements?
Many people begin noticing some improvements within the first few months of consistent therapy, particularly in areas like emotional regulation and crisis management skills. More significant changes in relationship patterns and self-image typically develop over 1-2 years of committed treatment. However, the timeline varies greatly between individuals, and some benefits of therapy continue developing for years. The important thing is finding the right therapeutic approach and maintaining consistent engagement with treatment.
Meet our Therapists
Meet our Therapists
Waqas Maqsood is an integrative counsellor and registered member of the BACP with over 600 clinical hours. Holding an MA in Integrative Counselling and a BSc in Neuroscience, he offers a holistic, flexible approach that supports clients with anxiety, trauma, low self-esteem, and life transitions.
More
Adults (18+)
Victoria is a compassionate and down-to-earth therapist with an MSc in Counselling and Psychotherapy and more than 1,900 clinical hours of experience. A registered member of the BACP, she supports both individuals and couples, offering a warm, collaborative space to explore relationships, self-worth, anxiety, and personal growth in a supportive environment.
More
Adults (18+)
Couples
Matt is an integrative counsellor holding a Diploma in Integrative Counselling with experience delivering more than 500 clinical sessions. He combines counselling, mindfulness, and meditation techniques to support clients with anxiety, depression, trauma, self-esteem issues, and life transitions, helping people build resilience, clarity, and a stronger sense of emotional wellbeing.
More
Adults (18+)
At Manchester Counselling, we are pleased to introduce Grant Fairlie (MBACP), a counsellor with over 1,900 clinical hours and more than three years of practice. Grant brings a background in drama education and specialist experience supporting neurodiverse adults and adolescents.
More
Adults (18+)
Introducing Andrea Szentgyorgyi, a UKCP-registered integrative psychotherapist with over 1,000 clinical hours. Andrea combines person-centred, solution-focused therapy with advanced techniques including hypnotherapy and EMDR, creating a tailored and flexible approach for each client. With 6 years of experience, she provides a safe and supportive space to explore challenges and promote lasting emotional wellbeing.
More
Adults (18+)
At Manchester Counselling, we’re proud to introduce Isabella May Leonard (MSc), an experienced person-centred psychotherapist offering therapy for adults. With over 2,500 clinical hours, Isabella brings warmth, compassion, and professional depth to her practice, with experience across private practice, NHS Talking Therapies, and third-sector services. She provides both short- and long-term therapy, creating a safe and reflective space where clients can explore challenges at their own pace.
More
Adults (18+)
Jayne Tamsett is a BACP accredited counsellor with a BA (Hons) in Counselling & Psychotherapy and over 4,700 clinical hours. She works with adults experiencing anxiety, trauma, depression, and relationship challenges. Her practice offers an inclusive and compassionate space where clients feel heard, understood, and supported in their personal growth
More
Adults (18+)
Waqas Maqsood is an integrative counsellor and registered member of the BACP with over 600 clinical hours. Holding an MA in Integrative Counselling and a BSc in Neuroscience, he offers a holistic, flexible approach that supports clients with anxiety, trauma, low self-esteem, and life transitions.
More
Adults (18+)
Victoria is a compassionate and down-to-earth therapist with an MSc in Counselling and Psychotherapy and more than 1,900 clinical hours of experience. A registered member of the BACP, she supports both individuals and couples, offering a warm, collaborative space to explore relationships, self-worth, anxiety, and personal growth in a supportive environment.
More
Adults (18+)
Couples
Matt is an integrative counsellor holding a Diploma in Integrative Counselling with experience delivering more than 500 clinical sessions. He combines counselling, mindfulness, and meditation techniques to support clients with anxiety, depression, trauma, self-esteem issues, and life transitions, helping people build resilience, clarity, and a stronger sense of emotional wellbeing.
More
Adults (18+)
Waqas Maqsood is an integrative counsellor and registered member of the BACP with over 600 clinical hours. Holding an MA in Integrative Counselling and a BSc in Neuroscience, he offers a holistic, flexible approach that supports clients with anxiety, trauma, low self-esteem, and life transitions.
More
Adults (18+)
Victoria is a compassionate and down-to-earth therapist with an MSc in Counselling and Psychotherapy and more than 1,900 clinical hours of experience. A registered member of the BACP, she supports both individuals and couples, offering a warm, collaborative space to explore relationships, self-worth, anxiety, and personal growth in a supportive environment.
More
Adults (18+)
Couples
Matt is an integrative counsellor holding a Diploma in Integrative Counselling with experience delivering more than 500 clinical sessions. He combines counselling, mindfulness, and meditation techniques to support clients with anxiety, depression, trauma, self-esteem issues, and life transitions, helping people build resilience, clarity, and a stronger sense of emotional wellbeing.
More
Adults (18+)
At Manchester Counselling, we are pleased to introduce Grant Fairlie (MBACP), a counsellor with over 1,900 clinical hours and more than three years of practice. Grant brings a background in drama education and specialist experience supporting neurodiverse adults and adolescents.
More
Adults (18+)